What better proof of love can there be than money? A ten-shilling note shows incontrovertibly just how mad about you a man is.

When I was young, I wanted to find the Great Dark Man. When I said that I realise now that people thought that by 'dark' I meant black, and that by 'great' I meant big. Whereas I only meant a strong, mysterious person; someone who would 'take me away from all this.'

Life was a funny thing that happened to me on the way to the grave.

Exhibitionists have no friends, no friends at all.

One should always be wary of anyone who promises that their love will last longer than a weekend.

America believes in freedom. The English don't believe in it. They don't believe in happiness.

Manners are a way of getting what you want without appearing to be an absolute swine.