You want to go play with your new friends back there? The really pale ones with the taste for plasma? --Shane

Why was it the hot mean girls always ran in packs, like hyenas?

You know what we call pedestrians in Morganville? Mobile bloodbanks.

Shane talking to Claire - "In this whole screwed up town, you're the only thing that's always been right to me," He whispered. "I love you, Claire

Nice " Shane said. "I'm warming up to this bloodsucking thing Mikey." "No you're not." "Okay no I'm not but right now let's pretend I am.

Mind the dead man, my dear.

Really? Is he running for Worst Boyfriend Ever?" "In the subcategory of Completely Awesome.