Why buy a book when you can join a library?

I never think of myself as a celebrity - or even an actor, actually. I think of myself as a writer-director.

You now have the least amount of time you've ever had, to do everything you've ever wanted to do. Enjoy your life. You only get one

A world without any lies at all is not a good world, because it's artless and because there are no white lies, no flattery.

I've never worked out what the moral of Humpty Dumpty is. I can only think of: Don't sit on a wall, if you're an egg.

What will it feel like after you die? Exactly the same as it felt for those billions of years before you were born.

To complain about critics in a business is like a sailor complaining about the waves. Go back to the beach if you don't like it.