The only cure for a real hangover is death.

The ideal age for a boy to own a dog is between forty-five and fifty.

There are several natural phenomena which I shall have to have explained to me before I can keep on going as a resident member ofthe human race. One is the metamorphosis which hats and suits undergo exactly one week after their purchase, whereby they are changed from smart, intensely becoming articles of apparel into something children use when they want to "dress up like daddy.

There are several ways to apportion the family income, all of them unsatisfactory.

This is a test. It is only a test. Had it been an actual job, you would have received raises, promotions, and other signs of appreciation.

In preparing the soil for planting, you will need several tools. Dynamite would be a beautiful thing to use, but it would have a tendency to get the dirt into the front-hall and track up the stairs.

England and America should scrap cricket and baseball and come up with a new game that they both can play. Like baseball, for example.