A successful artist is inspired by his muse, and his muse is inspired by the payment of a commission.

For the most part, we carnivores do not eat other carnivores. We prefer to eat our vegetarian friends.

A commuter tie-up consists of you — and people who for some reason won't use public transit.

What happens if I do nothing?

Life is too short to hold a grudge, also too long.

Ever wonder what crime you committed that you are confined to a small enclosure above your sinuses, under permanent skull arrest?

Never ask, "What reason do I have to be happy?" Instead ask, "To what purpose can I attach my happiness?