I was once a skeptic but was converted by the two missionaries on either side of my nose.

It is hard to resist a flatterer who gets it right.

Even if you think the Big Bang created the stars, don't you wonder who sent the flowers?

There is a public me and a private me, who, if they were separate people, probably wouldn't exchange Christmas cards.

My eyesight's gone, my reflexes are shot, and I can't stay awake, but thank God I can still drive.

Retirement is having nothing to do and someone always keeping you from it.

What are memories but dreams of a better past.