Life is a series of family photos in which eventually you stop showing up.

Ah, yes, my social life — a series of encounters where we briefly debate who is in the greater rush.

The most valuable lesson man has learned from his dog is to kick a few blades of grass over it and move on.

The only creature on earth whose natural habitat is a zoo is the zookeeper.

Love may be blind, but if you've ever known a blind person, they still know where everything is.

Sometimes in life you have an appointment with destiny, and sometimes you just have to get destiny to squeeze you in.

There have been days when I sought respite from my life, only to find myself calling every hour to check on it.