There was never a wise saying that couldn't be made wiser by adding the words, "and vice-versa.

Having perfected our disguise, we spend our lives searching for someone we don't fool.

You get to an age when there are really just two reasons to get up in the morning — for goodness sake and for heaven's sake.

The trouble with having a body is that people know it's where you hang out and you don't get any privacy.

Sign over the gates of hell: "Doesn't mean you're a bad person."

Two people can have a middling day, but one rounds up and the other rounds down.

You can spend too much time wondering which of identical twins is the more alike.