She was the only creature in the world who would really care if something happened to me, even if it was only because I was the bringer of kibble.

He rose to his feet in one fluid move, the better to look down at me. “You don’t know me, princess. Some people have reasons for doing things, and don’t just go wherever they’re told or drift whichever way they’re pushed.

Focus, Amy. Just because he looked great in the saddle did not mean he wasn't an axe murderer.

Long-haired Chihuahuas have no notion they are bite-sized.

Screw you, John." "Sorry, Sylvie. Can't—they frown on that kind of thing between step-siblings.

Don’t ever trust anyone who’s writing a book. They make up lies for a living.

When your family is twice as weird as normal, you have to be twice as polite to authority, because authority hates weird.