You've got to have gumption. You've got to be willing to stand up on the stage for no money for ten years.

Don't judge me. I made a lot of money.

The best part about poker is there's no down side.

I can't claim to feel like I've been under some man's thumb in comedy. I've sort of always done my own thing for better or worse, and have been lucky enough to be able to perform ever since.

I'm good at asking other people questions, but I'm not really good at answering questions.

President Trump - God forbid - the country will be okay, I promise. I don't know exactly what the country will look like, but we will survive it.

I find Donald Trump so haphazard, and that keeps me up at night.