Smile well and often, it makes people wonder what you've been up to.

If your stomach disputes you, lie down and pacify it with cool thoughts.

Keep the juices flowing by jangling around gently as you move.

If you tell a lie, always rehearse it. If it don't sound good to you, it won't sound good to anybody.

I ain't ever had a job, I just always played baseball.

I was born in August, no July, 1908.

Throw high risers at the chin; throw peas at the knees; throw it here when they're lookin' there; throw it there when they're lookin' here.