Technology has the shelf life of a banana.

Computers shouldn't be unusable. You don't need to know how to work a telephone switch to make a phone call, or how to use the Hoover Dam to take a shower, or how to work a nuclear-power plant to turn on the lights.

When Steve Ballmer calls me wacko, I consider that a compliment.

Putting Windows [3.11] on top of DOS is like putting whipped cream on a road apple [horse poop].

This Windows 95 hairball has become so big, so unmanageable, so hard to use, so hard to configure, so hard to keep up and running, so hard to keep secure. Windows 95 is a great gift to give your kid this Christmas because it will keep your kid fascinated for months trying to get it up and running and trying to figure out how to use it.

In a world without fences, who needs Gates?

Yes, we have a dress code. You have to dress.