When I retire, I'm going after his job. If I don't make sheriff, I'm going after his job. He's not that good. You can quote me on that.

I'm getting older. I'm getting sexier. I'm getting meaner. I can still do what I do.

Incense. Books. Just weird.

Y'all reporters like my quotes, don't you. Yeah, my quotes are Shaqalicious.

I don't think anything of Laura Frank. You heard me - Laura Frank. Not Lawrence. Laura... It's not that I blame him, I just wish he'd go to a manly tactic and just fight me. Don't whine. When he whines, that's when I change his name of Lawrence Frank.

For all my friends in the media who like quotes, mark this quote down. From this day on I'd like to be known as 'The Big Aristotle' because Aristotle once said, 'Excellence is not a singular act; it's a habit. You are what you repeatedly do.'

The stats win nothing. I'm still sexy. I'm still great.