Y'all reporters like my quotes, don't you. Yeah, my quotes are Shaqalicious.

Somebody out there was trying to use my language and trying to speak for me. Rather than have that happen, I thought I'd do it myself. It's a fun thing. It's a way for fans to connect.

I don't know how it is for you earthlings, but where I'm from, strength is mental.

I'm more like a senior adviser so I don't like to come in here and try to take over. Just like your basic karate movie where the young guys come to the old guys with beards who have them do weird stuff to get to the other side. That's who I am, the old guy with a long beard.

I don't see us having a problem. It's going to be my job to manage the locker room, anyway, so it will work out.

You know, I'm very photogenic.

You gotta fight all the karate guys, and once you kill them off, now you gotta get to the ninjas. Once you get through the ninjas, now you gotta get to the showmen. Now me, I'm the showman of big men.