My wife Staci made me go to a wedding last weekend...If it weren’t for her, I’d be happy.
If somebody is not on the same page with me humor wise, I can't give them that.
When I say 'friends,' I use that term loosely, as I don't actually have any.
If a restaurant offers crayons, I always take them and color throughout the meal. It beats talking to the people I came to dinner with.
Repeats are the absolute soul-crushing killers of the comics page.
Brits have a better sense of humor in most ways. It's darker, more cutting.