I had a lot of coaches growing up that were very hard on the kids in the name of building character, but it could have the opposite effect on kids.

Don't underestimate your kids. Don't be condescending, because they're children but they're not stupid.

As soon as you start to talk about your own mannerisms, you are screwed. Because if you are aware of your own mannerisms, or beyond that even what makes any one thing funny to people, I really ascribe to that that if you start deconstructing it too much, it is immediately not funny.

I am a patriot and I want to see this country [the USA] soar again.

Like most people, I have painful memories of trying to fit in as a child. I wore, said, and did pretty much what everyone else did.

Yes. It is true. I, Michael Scott, am signing up with an online dating service. Thousands of people have done it, and I am going to do it. I need a username, and I have a great one. 'Little Kid Lover.' That way people will know exactly where my priorities are at.

I ate fiberglass insulation. It wasn’t cotton candy like the guy said… my tummy itches.