I never had any desire to be famous. I find people who do really sad. I genuinely feel sorry for them because there is nothing of substancein their lives. I am happy when I am writing or performing. Not when I sit there being "famous". I like recognition for my work, but not recognition for being "that bloke off the telly". It is genuinely humbling when a woman comes up to me, as someone did recently, to say she wanted to commit suicide after her husband died, and my show cheered her up and made her feel better. That's great.

Even great people are always slightly disappointing, which is generally what makes them interesting.

I am of the very last generation who didn't have computers at school. As we grow old we'll become something of an aberration.

If things don't come easy to you, you have to pull a rabbit out of a hat.

No one has a monopoly on wisdom, and even for people who aren't religious, you can learn things from religious people.

I like the transience of Klimt paintings.

Actually the best thing I did was to get thrown out by my wife. She's living with a fitness instructor. He drinks that yellow stuff in tins. He's an idiot.