I guess I wouldn't believe in anything if it weren't for my lucky astrology mood watch.

In talking to girls I could never remember the right sequence of things to say. I'd meet a girl and say, Hi, was it good for you too? If a girl spent the night, I'd wake up in the morning and then try to get her drunk.

What is comedy? Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke.

I knew I wanted to be in comedy but the path of least resistance was doing stand-up in folk music clubs where I could get on stage. I guess you could get up no matter how bad you were and you didn't have to audition. You just got up. Everything else required an audition and if you auditioned for a TV show, you would stand in line with a hundred other people. But at the clubs, it was okay just to get up, so that's why I started in stand-up.

I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.

I don't watch myself gener­ally. I do something, see it once, and then I'll probably never see it again unless it's an accident.

As much as I remember, I just thought, I want to sing a song that starts normal and ends crazy.