It was long after midnight and the stars looked damp and chilly; the air was full of the busy silence of the night, which is created by hundreds of small furry things treading very carefully in the hope of finding dinner while avoiding being the main course.

Every procedure for getting a cat to take a pill works fine - once. Like the Borg, they learn.

The Kraken stirs. And ten billion sushi dinners cry out for vengeance.

Mere animals couldn’t possibly manage to act like this. You need to be a human being to be really stupid.

Some pirates achieved immortality by great deeds of cruelty or derring-do. Some achieved immortality by amassing great wealth. But the captain had long ago decided that he would, on the whole, prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.

The harder I work, the luckier I become.

Raising the flag and singing the anthem are, while somewhat suspicious, not in themselves acts of treason.