I've often felt depressed; everyone feels depressed.

Of course, Ankh-Morpork's citizens had always claimed that the river water was incredibly pure. Any water that had passed through so many kidneys, they reasoned, had to be very pure indeed.

Granny Weatherwax was not a good loser. From her point of view, losing was something that happened to other people.

A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores.

He's probably their battle poet, too." "You mean he makes up heroic songs about famous battles?" "No, no. He recites poems that frighten the enemy....When a well-trained gonnagle starts to recite, the enemy's ears explode.

Truly, he thought, the way of enlightenment is like unto half a mile of broken glass.

The fastest way to travel is to be there already.