All assassins had a full-length mirror in their rooms, because it would be a terrible insult to anyone to kill them when you were badly dressed.

This is a lovely party," said the Bursar to a chair, "I wish I was here.

Cake is not the issue here.

You're not going to tell me they built fifty-foot-high killer golems, are you?" "Only a man would think of that. It's our job," said Moist. "If you don't think of fifty-foot-high killer golems first, someone else will.

I wonder if it's like this for mountain climbers, he thought. You climb bigger and bigger mountains and you know that one day one of them is going to be just that bit too steep. But you go on doing it, because it’s so-o good when you breathe the air up there. And you know you'll die falling.

In the world I live in, 'not worse' is nearly as good as 'better'.

He'd heard that writers spent all day in their dressing gowns drinking champagne. This is, of course, absolutely true.