I cannot read a fortune cookie without breaking down and crying. I am sensitive.
If Radiohead were a fruit we would be apples, because apples are festive
The pointless snide remarks of hammerheaded sharks
If Bono can release an album out of nowhere then so can I!
Sometimes I stand in store windows and pretend to be a mannequin. People are like 'hey, that mannequin looks alot like thom yorke' Then I start to sing The Gloaming and lurch toward them and they run off horrified.
Well actually I'm not a man but a carrot. The band was eating salads one day and a carrot fell off of the salad bar onto a microphone and the band realized that they had just discovered something brilliant. Me.