This requires a level of delusion/egomania usually reserved for popes and drag queens

Then she took out a speculum the size of a milk shake machine. Even Michelle Duggar would have flinched at this thing, but I had never seen one before.

The barrier between TV and movies has come down and film actors are willing to do TV and vice versa, because they just want to follow what's interesting.

Life is improvisation.

I think my level of fame will drop back down. I think it’ll recede. In fact, I know it will. That’s life on planet earth. And I’m okay with that. Besides getting tables at restaurants and special treatment at the airport, what else is there?

I have no affinity for animals. I don’t hate animals and I would never hurt an animal; I just don’t actively care about them. When a coworker shows me cute pictures of her dog, I struggle to respond correctly, like an autistic person who has been taught to recognize human emotions from flash cards. In short, I am the worst.

Gay people don’t actually try to convert people. That’s Jehovah’s Witnesses you’re thinking of.