The topic of working moms is a tap-dance recital in a minefield.

I don't like a tremendous amount of conflict. I don't think that fighting and passion are the same thing.

Pentagon records show that at least 8,000 members of the all-volunteer U.S. Army have deserted since the Iraq war began. Hey, at least somebody has an exit strategy.

One afternoon a girl walked by in a bikini and my cousin Janet scoffed, “Look at the hips on her.” I panicked. What about the hips? Were they too big? Too small? What were my hips? I didn’t know hips could be a problem. I thought there was just fat or skinny. This was how I found out that there are an infinite number of things that can be “incorrect” on a woman’s body.

Confidence is 10 percent hard work and 90 percent delusion, just thinking foolishly that you will be able to do what you want to do

For my first show at 'SNL', I wrote a Bill Clinton sketch, and during our read-through, it wasn't getting any laughs. This weight of embarrassment came over me, and I felt like I was sweating from my spine out. But I realized, 'Okay, that happened, and I did not die.' You've got to experience failure to understand that you can survive it.

When I turned 50, I looked in the mirror and I thought: "Hey, this isn't the dress rehearsal, this is life and I don't know how much longer I'm going to have!"