Not only is my wardrobe totally average, my body's totally average. I love all the candy-fantasy fulfillment of Sex and the City.

After college, I knew I wanted to work in comedy, so the first thing I did was go to where the comedy was. I moved from Charlottesville to Chicago, because that's where The Second City and Improv Olympics are. You have to go wherever you need to go to study what interests you.

I don't like a tremendous amount of conflict. I don't think that fighting and passion are the same thing.

Most of the time you're too busy to think about it. But every now and then you say, 'I work at 'Saturday Night Live,' and that is so cool.

You know who does have a funny bone in her body? Your mom every night for a dollar.

I think my level of fame will drop back down. I think it’ll recede. In fact, I know it will. That’s life on planet earth. And I’m okay with that. Besides getting tables at restaurants and special treatment at the airport, what else is there?

This requires a level of delusion/egomania usually reserved for popes and drag queens