America thinks of itself as a meritocracy, so people have more respect for success and more contempt for failure.

Everyone said to me growing up, "You're like an American. You have to go to America. That's your spiritual home."

I've never been to a shrink. But my parents were very psychologically literate - my father had undergone Freudian analysis - and we often talked about other people in psychological terms, so I picked up a lot of that.

I miss being fawned over by restaurateurs and chefs.

I wouldn't describe myself as a master of anything.

I was once hired to write a column for 'The Guardian' and then got fired before I'd submitted my first one. That was unusual. Most newspapers wait until I've written at least one piece for them before firing me.

I think I've been wishing for celebrity for so long that I've got used to being someone who's petitioning the establishment for acceptance... my whole schtick, my whole identity, is so wrapped up in being a petitioner that I don't really know how to react now that petition has been granted.