Be careful not to do your good deeds when there's no one watching you.

Always predict the worst, and you'll be hailed as a prophet.

Oh, the Protestants hate the Catholics/ And the Catholics hate the Protestants/ And the Hindus hate the Muslims/ And everybody hates the Jews.

The civil liberties types who are fighting this issue have to fight it, owing to the nature of the laws, as a matter of freedom of speech and stifling of free expression and so on. But we know what's really involved, dirty books are fun. That's all there is to it. But you can't get up in a court and say that.

If you asked me to write a rock song or a rap song, I couldn't do it because they're not in my fingers.

Bad weather always looks worse through a window.

Once the rockets are up, who cares where they come down ? That's not my department.