Bill Clinton is a liar, a perverted kind of a guy anyway, and he is always stroking black folks rather than telling them the truth.

I'm not vouching for Putin's character, he seems like a shady guy. Hard to see why he's a threat was.

We have the - the longest, friendliest border, you know, for the - for the longest time in the history - in recorded history, really, with Canada. And they get to sit on their moral perch, you know, take the moral high ground, say, oh, United States, shame on you about Iraq. They make us look bad internationally. And it's really not fair.

The war on Christmas. This is the most ridiculous right wing talking point I have ever lived through.The idea is that liberals want to get rid of Christmas.

I can't wait to work for Rick Kaplan. He's a great producer. I would host an infomercial if he would produce it.

Canada thinks we're married; we don't know it exists. Every time we tell Canada to knock it off, it just feeds the fire.

Canadians are so easily wounded.