Vir Das Quotes

I'm a stand-up comedian-turned-actor-turned-vampire at night.

In Bollywood, I think Boman Irani and Vinay Pathak are unbelievably good at comedy.

To me, the trick is not how can I make people laugh. It is, how can I make people laugh in a different way.

I did theatre in the U.S. because there, content-wise, it's very light. In India, theatre tends to get preachy.

Relationship humour gets the most laughs. If I'm able to get the women laughing, men will have to laugh along because they would be scared to death.

In Bollywood, people struggle because there is a new person joining every week, who joins an assembly line of people who are very replaceable. But if you are unique, you don't have to struggle that much.

I auditioned nine times for 'Delhi Belly,' and it was torturous!

I fear debt. I don't like being indebted to banks. I have a rule in life that I will get it when I can afford it.

I have a rule - 'funny is funny!' When I write comedy, it's not my aim to upset people. I will be offensive, edgy and immature, but I will also be very intelligent and relevant. At my shows, there are no holy cows.

Someday social media might, hopefully in some small measure, wake up to the fact that other people's failures are not your successes.

I do films which get me out of my comedian routine so that I don't get bored being a stand-up comedian. And with films, it's here today, gone tomorrow. So stand-up comedy is here to stay for me.

When it comes to English stand-up comedy, Indians have only seen the best - Jerry Seinfeld, Bill Cosby and the like. So, when someone claims to be an English stand-up comedian in India, he'd better be very good if he's going to make a life of it.

Whatever movies I sign, they have to get me out of my comfort zone. Otherwise, I would get bored very easily.

My personal favorite is Woody Allen, who is just amazing as a comedian.

In 'Delhi Belly,' I was bald; in other movies I always carried a different look.

I am edgy, raw, offensive, vulgar, untruthful, but intelligent. My jokes are always realistic. I do not make fun of children or people who cannot fight back. That is my limitation.

A stand-up comedian will never be the life of a party. Instead, he will be the guy who is standing at a corner and observing people.

In a big Bollywood romantic film, taking my shirt off and spreading the hand towards the mountain with dancers behind me are not my cup of tea.

I am a big fan of Adam Sandler and Ben Stiller, who have carved a niche for themselves. I think doing different kind of films gives you longevity and the ability to set yourself apart.

Women do come up to me after a show, but it's usually to say, 'Yhank you for making us laugh,' and all that.

The idea is to do out-of-the-box films that showcase my versatility and talent.

Comedy is a live art, and the only way to record a comedy rock album is to do it live. The audience and their laughter is just as much a part of the album sound as our music. No retakes, no room for error.

Delhi women - they're the most beautiful women! But the fact remains that they know they are gorgeous.

All of the films I'm doing are young, urban, high-concept, funny films. That's the zone where I'd like to play and have fun in.

I feel like I share a great relationship with my audience where they trust my judgment and choice of films and sense of comedy.

For me,it is very important to believe in the kind of movies I do. Rang De Basanti made me feel good about Indian cinema. The movie instilled in me,a confidence so strong,that I wanted to be a part of the revolution in Bollywood.

I love the food, the girls, the sky and everything that is Delhi. I have very fond memories of the Moolchand flyover.

Comedy comes from confusion.

Chennai is one of the scariest crowds to face. Everyone looks so conservative, but once you crack the first joke, they are so appreciatively loud that they will hit you with a laugh that will scare you stiff and yet give you energy. Chennaiites give me the loudest laughs; it's the coolest crowd to perform for.

You realise the responsibility of carrying a film on your shoulders when people are investing money in you and they recognise the hard work you have to put in.

I've been reading a lot of books on history, and watching a lot of educational TV. Wikipedia too, even though it is not reliable.

Surround yourself with a bunch of like-minded people, and you'll soak up their habits like a starved sponge. Fat people with fat friends care less about their weight.

Time management is the mantra of my life.

Class I to XII wasn't much help; I was always a mediocre student. But when I pursued higher education and studied economics with theatre or psychology with science fiction, I got a whole new world view.