No good play is a success; fine writing and high morals are useless on the stage. I have been scribbling twaddle for thirty-five years to suit the public taste, and I should know.
It isn't so much what's on the table that matters, as what's on the chairs.
Life is a joke that's just begun.
No one can have a higher opinion of him than I have; and I think he's a dirty little beast.
I accept refreshment at any hands, however lowly.
He did nothing in particular, and did it very well.