Man is nature's sole mistake.

I am the very model of a modern major general

My family pride is something inconceivable. I can't help it. I was born sneering.

No one can have a higher opinion of him than I have; and I think he's a dirty little beast.

I am, in point of fact, a particularly haughty and exclusive person, of pre-Adamite ancestral descent. You will understand this when I tell you that I can trace my ancestry back to a protoplasmal primordial atomic globule.

When every blessed thing you have is made of silver, or of gold, you long for simple pewter.

A popular speaker, however unpopular and insignificant, has only to wind up his speech with half-a-dozen lines of Shakespeare (and to make it clearly understood that they are Shakespeare's) and he will sit down amid thunders of applause.