I first wanted to be a comedian when I was six or seven and my dad showed me Laurel and Hardy's "Perfect Day" on tv.

Your words and thoughts have physical power.

Even Hitler didn't wake up going, 'Let me do the most evil thing I can do today.' I think he woke up in the morning and using a twisted, backwards logic, he set out to do what he thought was 'good.'

On learning to swim: I'm too big to have some woman hold my stomach and say 'Now kick your feet.'

Probably means there's a good chance. Possibly means we might or we might not.

I don't necessarily believe in organized religion.

Boys laugh at what they put girls through - but they won't be laughing when - they're wiping tears off their daughters face for the same reason.