August depresses me a little. I don't even feel like eating. And when I don't eat, that's a sure sign of stagnation.

Remember Judy Garland? She retired 40 times.

I wore dresses all the time. I like to wear dresses.

Having a phobia has changed me.

I talk too much. I eat too much.

There are plenty of good-looking women out there. Go get them.

Viewers figure, 'Uncle Willard doesn't know any more about the weather than I do.' They're right.