Jazz is a big thing with me. It's a very big passion of mine, to play it. I'm an amateur musician and I love everything about it. I was obsessed with jazz when I was 15 years old and I know a lot about it because I've loved it so much.

Dying is like making love, except you don't get naseous afterwards.

I've had bad luck in my two previous marriages. The first wife left me, and the second did not. ­

I have one last request. Don't use embalming fluid on me; I want to be stuffed with crab meat.

I'm not anti-social. I'm just not social.

For some reason I've always had an irrational love for New York. There's no reason that you would necessarily like it on paper. It's very expensive.

More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.