On general principle, I boycott shows that don't employ actors.

Omnipresence can be a good or bad thing, I suppose. I don't want to spend a lot of time thinking about it. I'm super-grateful.

I'm my own boss and my boss is a total ass.

I love it when I come across a word I don't know. And I would never treat my audience like they weren't smart enough to come along with me.

I want to point out, that this is not my fault that everyone's afraid of me, because I did not kill a couple people the other day.

No one wants to hear about how awesome you were; people want to hear about the time you blew it. So I think the longer you do stand-up, the more comfortable you are. You stop wanting to hide your foibles and instead want to show who you are.

I talk to grown-ups who are out to have a good time and they want to be spoken to in a different way. I don't want to be pandered to, so I try not to pander.