Maybe I'll make a huge color tapestry from my belly button lint.

If you want to avoid heated arguments, never discuss religion, politics, or whether the toilet paper roll should go over or under.

I suppose I had my rock star fantasies while I was singing into my hairbrush in the bathroom mirror, but I never really consciously said, 'OK, this is what I'm going to do for a living and I'm going to be Weird Al.'

There are probably a few library fines I haven't paid yet, but I'm a pretty clean-cut guy overall.

It's hard to say, I picked one of my favorite articles for the MAD vault. Which is one of the features of the Magazine so they don't have to actually pay artists or writers to come up with new stuff.

I write and write and write, and then I edit it down to the parts that I think are amusing, or that help the storyline, or I'll write a notebook full of ideas of anecdotes or story points, and then I'll try and arrange them in a way that they would tell a semi-cohesive story.

There are a lot of songs that would ostensibly be a good candidate for parody, yet I can't think of a clever enough idea.