REALITY, n. The dream of a mad philosopher. That which would remain in the cupel if one should assay a phantom. The nucleus of a vacuum.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

RECOUNT, n. In American politics, another throw of the dice, accorded to the player against whom they are loaded.

ORATORY, n. A conspiracy between speech and action to cheat the understanding. A tyranny tempered by stenography.

If every hypocrite in the United States were to break his leg to-day the country could be successfully invaded to-morrow by the warlike hypocrites of Canada.

There are four kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.

HOSPITALITY, n. The virtue which induces us to feed and lodge certain persons who are not in need of food and lodging.