Consul - in American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is given one by the Administration on condition that he leave the country.

ZENITH, n. The point in the heavens directly overhead to a man standing or a growing cabbage. A man in bed or a cabbage in the pot is not considered as having a zenith, though Horizontalists hold that the posture of the body was immaterial.

Doubt is the father of invention.

We must stop chasing dollars, stop lying, stop cheating, stop ignoring art, literature, and all the refining agencies and instrumentalities of civilization.

HUSBAND, n. One who, having dined, is charged with the care of the plate.

EUCHARIST, n. A sacred feast of the religious sect of Theophagi. A dispute once unhappily arose among the members of this sect as to what it was that they ate. In this controversy some five hundred thousand have already been slain, and the question is still unsettled.

Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.