Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.

Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.

Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one's neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.

Birth: The first and direst of all disasters.

Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.

STORY, n. A narrative, commonly untrue.

TALK, v.t. To commit an indiscretion without temptation, from an impulse without purpose.