Dog - a kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the world's worship.

What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.

EFFECT, n. The second of two phenomena which always occur together in the same order. The first, called a Cause, is said to generate the other-which is no more sensible than it would be for one who has never seen a dog except in pursuit of a rabbit to declare the rabbit the cause of the dog.

When in Rome, do as Rome does.

Learning -the kind of ignorance affected by (and affecting) civilized races, as distinguished from ignorance, the sort of learning incurred by savages. See nonsense.

DEPENDENT, adj. Reliant upon another's generosity for the support which you are not in a position to exact from his fears.

Opportunity: A favorable occasion for grasping a disappointment.