A bad workman quarrels with the man who calls him that.

Glutton- A person who escapes the evils of moderation by committing dyspepsia.

Bigamy, n. A mistake in taste for which the wisdom of the future will adjudge a punishment called trigamy.

REVEILLE, n. A signal to sleeping soldiers to dream of battlefields no more, but get up and have their blue noses counted.

Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.

Christian - One who follows the teachings of Christ insofar as they are not inconsistent with a life of sin.

The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.