Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.

An absolute monarchy is one in which the sovereign does as he pleases so long as he pleases the assassins.

HOMILETICS, n. The science of adapting sermons to the spiritual needs, capacities and conditions of the congregation.

Clarinet n. An instrument of torture operated by a person with cotton in his ears. There are two instruments worse than a clarinet – two clarinets.

Peace in international affairs: a period of cheating between periods of fighting

New York is too strenuous for me; it gets on my nerves.

LEXICOGRAPHER, n. A pestilent fellow who, under the pretense of recording some particular stage in the development of a language, does what he can to arrest its growth, stiffen its flexibility and mechanize its methods.