Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.

WITCH, n. (1) Any ugly and repulsive old woman, in a wicked league with the devil. (2) A beautiful and attractive young woman, in wickedness a league beyond the devil.

Custard: A detestable substance produced by a malevolent conspiracy of the hen, the cow, and the cook.

REALITY, n. The dream of a mad philosopher. That which would remain in the cupel if one should assay a phantom. The nucleus of a vacuum.

Economy, n. Purchasing the barrel of whiskey that you do not need for the price of the cow that you cannot afford.

The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.

Genius - to know without having learned; to draw just conclusions from unknown premises; to discern the soul of things.