ELECTOR, n. One who enjoys the sacred privilege of voting for the man of another man's choice.

RUIN, v. To destroy. Specifically, to destroy a maid's belief in the virtue of maids.

General," said the commander of the delinquent brigade, "I am persuaded that any further display of valor by my troops will bring them into collision with the enemy.

Clarinet n. An instrument of torture operated by a person with cotton in his ears. There are two instruments worse than a clarinet – two clarinets.

ENTERTAINMENT, n. Any kind of amusement whose inroads stop short of death by injection.

OWE, v. To have (and to hold) a debt. The word formerly signified not indebtedness, but possession; it meant "own," and in the minds of debtors there is still a good deal of confusion between assets and liabilities.

ADMINISTRATION, n. An ingenious abstraction in politics, designed to receive the kicks and cuffs due to the premier or president. A man of straw, proof against bad-egging and dead-catting.