I keep a conscience uncorrupted by religion, a judgment undimmed by politics and patriotism, a heart untainted by friendships and sentiments unsoured by animosities.

Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.

REAR, n. In American military matters, that exposed part of the army that is nearest to Congress.

NIHILIST, n. A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi.

Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.

Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.

RATIONAL, adj. Devoid of all delusions save those of observation, experience and reflection.