Miss, n. A title which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market.

INK, n. A villainous compound of tannogallate of iron, gum-arabic, and water, chiefly used to facilitate the infection of idiocy and promote intellectual crime.

ORATORY, n. A conspiracy between speech and action to cheat the understanding. A tyranny tempered by stenography.

Alligator: The crocodile of America, superior in every detail to the crocodile of the effete monarchies of the Old World.

Theology is a thing of unreason altogether, an edifice of assumptions and dreams, a superstructure without a substructure

Boundary, n. In political geography, an imaginary line between two nations, separating the imaginary rights of one from the imaginary rights of another.

Here's to woman! Would that we could fold into her arms without falling into her hands.