Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.

You are not permitted to kill a woman who has wronged you, but nothing forbids you to reflect that she is growing older every minute.

EXHORT, v.t. In religious affairs, to put the conscience of another upon the spit and roast it to a nut-brown discomfort.

A miracle is an act or event out of the order of nature and unaccountable, as beating a normal hand of four kings and an ace with four aces and a king.

Here's to woman! Would that we could fold into her arms without falling into her hands.