Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.

In theology, the state of a luckless mortal prenatally damned. The doctrine of reprobation was taught by Calvin, whose joy in it was somewhat marred by the sad sincerity of his conviction that although some are foredoomed to perdition, others are predestined to salvation.

Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.

Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.

POETRY, n. A form of expression peculiar to the Land beyond the Magazines.

Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.

MALTHUSIAN, adj. Pertaining to Malthus and his doctrines, who believed in artificially limiting population, but found that it could not be done by talking. Herod of Judea, all the famous soldiers have been practical exponents of the Malthusian idea.