Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.

GRAVITATION, n. The tendency of all bodies to approach one another with a strength proportioned to the quantity of matter they contain-the quantity of matter they contain being ascertained by the strength of their tendency to approach one another. This is a lovely and edifying illustration of how science, having made A the proof of B, makes B the proof of A.

Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.

QUOTIENT, n. A number showing how many times a sum of money belonging to one person is contained in the pocket of another - usually about as many times as it can be got there.

EXILE, n. One who serves his country by residing abroad, yet is not an ambassador.

RESPIRATOR, n. An apparatus fitted over the nose and mouth of an inhabitant of London, whereby to filter the visible universe in its passage to the lungs.

PENITENT, adj. Undergoing or awaiting punishment.