EMOTION, n. A prostrating disease caused by a determination of the heart to the head. It is sometimes accompanied by a copious discharge of hydrated chloride of sodium from the eyes.

NEIGHBOR, n. One whom we are commanded to love as ourselves, and who does all he knows how to make us disobedient.

War: A by-product of the arts of peace.

Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket.

POVERTY, n. A file provided for the teeth of the rats of reform. Its victims are distinguished by possession of all the virtues and by their faith in leaders seeking to conduct them into a prosperity where they believe these to be unknown.

Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.

There are four kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.