War: A by-product of the arts of peace.

Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.

Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.

EAT, v.i. To perform successively (and successfully) the functions of mastication, humectation, and deglutition. 'I was in the drawing-room, enjoying my dinner,' said Brillat-Savarin, beginning an anecdote. 'What!' interrupted Rochebriant; 'eating dinner in a drawing-room?' 'I must beg you to observe, monsieur,' explained the great gastronome, 'that I did not say I was eating my dinner, but enjoying it. I had dined an hour before.'

PITIFUL, adj. The state of an enemy or opponent after an imaginary encounter with oneself.

Abnormal, adj. Not conforming to standard. In matters of thought and conduct, to be independent is to be abnormal, to be abnormal is to be detested.

Meekness: Uncommon patience in planning a revenge that is worth while.