SACRED, adj. Dedicated to some religious purpose; having a divine character; inspiring solemn thoughts or emotions; as... the Cow in India; the Crocodile, the Cat and the Onion of ancient Egypt.

Life - a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.

PERORATION, n. The explosion of an oratorical rocket. It dazzles, but to an observer having the wrong kind of nose its most conspicuous peculiarity is the smell of the several kinds of powder used in preparing it.

HARMONISTS, n. A sect of Protestants, now extinct, who came from Europe in the beginning of the last century and were distinguished for the bitterness of their internal controversies and dissensions.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

AFFLICTION, n. An acclimatizing process preparing the soul for another and bitter world.

Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.